Condoms and Bubblegum
by DemsMcGee
Summary: In which contraceptives have never been so misused.  WARNING; contains Tim/Kon, implied Dick/Jason, and some sex. Don't like? don't click.


One moment, Tim was half-asleep and snuggled up to Conner, letting himself wake up fully in the most pleasant way he knew. The next, the door was open and someone was opening the curtains and letting the early morning sunshine flood in. He pulled the covers higher over his head while simultaneously ripping the alarm clock out of the wall, ready to bludgeon whoever had decided to disturb him.  
>"Up and at 'em, Tim!" He let out a throaty groan and dropped the alarm clock to the floor, cursed whatever deity was choosing to punish him this early in the morning by unleashing all the early morning cheeriness that was Dick Grayson. Don't get him wrong, he was something of a morning person, but the kind that liked to sip coffee while doing work quietly on a laptop; not disturb people who were half awake and cuddling boyfriends. Slowly, Tim worked himself free from Conner's arms and shoved the covers off of him. Superboy only grunted and rolled away from him, clearly still asleep.<br>"What do you want this early in the morning, Dick?" He rubbed the sleep gunk from his eyes and swung his legs over the side of bed. Dick smiled and put his hands on his hips.  
>"Well, seeing as how cozy you and Conner have been getting lately, I think it's time for you to learn the wonders of condoms." A frown grew immediately on Tim's face as he went a bit red. They weren't… Sure, make-out sessions may have gotten a little... Heated, but nothing more than PG-13 went on in the bedroom.<br>"Just because you and Jason seem to be constantly all over each other doesn't mean Conner and I are. We aren't sexually active, so I really don't see a need for condoms." Dick shifted, a little uncomfortable at the mentioning of his relations with the second Robin, but he pressed on.  
>"It's going to happen soon, because I've seen some of he looks he's given you when you're not looking. I'm sure he could give Jason a run for his money with the things he probably thinks about doing to you." Tim abruptly got up and went around his room, getting dressed and ready for the day as he went along. This was ridiculous. Even if Conner thought things, he knew better than to push or cross any boundary lines Tim had set for them and Tim was quite certain Superboy was comfortable with where they were at. Not to mention it was absolutely mortifying that Dick could even <em>think<em> Tim was capable of doing such an act.  
>Nonetheless, after many an embarrassing talk about the birds and the bees, the dos and the don'ts (Dick stressed that sex on the job was <em>not<em> allowed, no matter how much Conner begged or tried to persuade him), and even hearing about a few of Dick's experiences, Tim was the very proud, (Dick was proud of it at least) owner of a grocery bag full of every size ("You wouldn't want to make him feel self-conscious if you didn't have the his size, would you?" Tim nearly walked out of the store at that) and nearly every type of condom in the store. Teenagers liked to experiment, according to his new and self-proclaimed sex mentor. No wanting anything more to do with condoms or the subject of sexual intercourse, abandoned the bag on the counter and retreated to the living room to do work on his laptop.  
>An hour later, Conner came into the living room and sat down next to Tim, digging around in a plastic bag. He thought nothing of it, thinking the other teen had gone out and gotten some sort of junk food to munch while sitting in front of the TV. Superboy was quite lucky he didn't have to work for his physique as much as normal people did. It wasn't until he saw a small box being pulled out of the bag that he looked away from his laptop to examine what his boyfriend really had.<br>"Want some? I'm pretty sure it's gum, because this box has flavors and you _can_ blow bubbles with it, but it's really, really chewy and some of it feels almost greasy. I think this one's grape." Conner offered an individually wrapped package to Tim, no sign of mischief on his face. Was his boyfriend actually being serious about this? Did he really not know that these were, or what kind of activity they were used for?  
>"Kon… Those are condoms. Not chewing gum." Conner stared at him, still chewing away at the contraceptive as if this wasn't that big of a deal.<br>"And this is relevant because…?"  
>"It's not any sort of food-like substance, and therefore is not made for ingestion. I suggest you remove that from your mouth." The condom was slowly spit out of Conner's mouth and shoved back into the original package.<br>"So… Mind telling me what it's for?" He raised his eyebrows expectantly as Tim started stuttering.  
>"It's… They're for…" For the love of all things intellectual, did he really have to do this? Kon was more of a visual learner, and he didn't exactly have any sort of diagrams to explain this, nor was he about to draw any sort of picture to explain this; and despite what Tim had said earlier this morning, getting lectured and hearing about it made him kind of want it. So, mustering up whatever courage he had, plucked the bag from the other side of his boyfriend and dug through it until he found what he thought would fit Conner, and what would feel the best. "It ah, would probably be better if I <em>showed<em> you, Kon." Tim grabbed Conner's wrist and pulled a little, leading the way to his bedroom.  
>Which was soon filled with moans and heavy panting, Tim's boundaries already far behind them, crossed by an all too eager Conner; and he had to admit, this was actually kind of enjoyable. It felt good to rub bare skin against bare skin, let his hands go places where they hadn't dared gone before, allow himself to <em>let go<em> for once. That was, until, Conner stopped them abruptly, stretching to grab the condom from the nightstand.  
>"Can you show me what this is for yet?" And there went any confidence Tim had built up in regards to this moment. He stared at the little package with slightly widened eyes, thinking this over. Putting this on Conner meant taking off his pants and underwear, and seeing his… And… And touching it, and oh God, what if was too big for the condom? He didn't know how Superman's DNA would've affected the human DNA within Conner in regards to this particular matter. Nonetheless, Tim grabbed the package and set it on the bed before getting to work on silently removing whatever clothing was in the way. Once that was completed, the package was ripped open and tossed to the side; now for the hard part. He nearly had to look away as he began rolling it on Conner, but after hearing a soft groan coming from him, Tim felt much more encouraged to keep going; it also helped that the condom seemed to fit just fine.<br>"A condom, combined with lube, is used for… For sex." He managed to state firmly, leaning over to open his nightstand drawer and rummage around before grabbing a container of lube (which he had meant to get rid of after Dick had bestowed it upon him as a gift some weeks ago) and handing it to Conner while giving a quick explanation of what to do with it, where to put it, and how Tim needed to be stretched before this could even happen comfortably.  
>The sounds of a creaking bed soon joined the room already filled with more moaning and more heavy panting, Conner and Tim rocking together in synch. He had figured it would've been easier and much less mortifying to ride the super-powered teen than to just lie on his back or get down on his knees and take it. At least he had <em>some<em> control this way, could adjust his body and drive himself back down to meet with the upward thrusts of Conner, could scratch away at that well-muscled chest of his, hug himself to Conner when he felt close to bursting, close, like he was going to explode if he didn't find _some _way to relieve all of this pressure, this heat, this, this; oh, hell.  
>Dick smiled almost knowingly when Tim limped into the kitchen (he really did try his best to cover it up) later that evening for dinner, followed by Conner, who looked more than pleased with himself. He hissed a little when he sat down on the chair, (the smug bastard never told him about what it would be like <em>afterward<em>) almost wishing he had decided to stand.  
>"So, how was your little afternoon delight?"<br>"Shut. Up."


End file.
